The Trough of Disillusionment

How to avoid drawing comparisons between our professional life and our day-to-day experiences?

For those of us in the technology arena the Expectations Curve in Technology by Gartner Group may be familiar. This curve essentially shows the life-cycle of a new technology from the moment it is created through its maturity. It is shown below.

It may be a little bit theoretical or even esoteric. Furthermore, how is it related to this blog? Well, it relates to everything and nothing. Here I don’t talk about technology; I talk about a life decision that has taken us through a very “interesting” –to say the least- process. And the likeness of the curve and our process has been eerie.  

As those of you reading these entries from the beginning would know (see: When a decision is made), certain events in our life and a decision-making process made us start walking this path. That point in time can easily be equated to the “Technology Trigger”. Once the decision was made and we started working towards it we started climbing the Peak of Inflated Expectations, which had been inflated a lot by us dreaming of creating opportunities and triggering change. And, as the curve predicted, we are now at the bottom of the Trough of Disillusionment. Right here:  

We have had bad experiences, there are times when our professional goals seem completely and utterly out of reach, there are some other times when this city’s culture and way of living clashes head-on with ours, and also times when it seems no change is possible. Times when all that is left is for us to think: What was I thinking? Who was I kidding when I made this decision? Was I high? 

Fortunately we set aside a large window of time to invest in this effort, and we hope there will be light at the end of the tunnel. I hope we will start climbing the slope of enlightenment at some point in time, and eventually become productive. But meanwhile, where can I get whatever got me high while I was in Australia?

Back after a while

I have not posted anything since April. Settling in Colombia has been interesting and busy, and there are many things to tell. Hopefully someone is still reading!

The falacy of fear

We all have different fears. From insignificant ones that are no more than a passing distraction to phobias that have the potential to wreak people’s lives. Feeling fear is a human characteristic, but our decision on how to face it is what differentiates people from one another.
 
Some people choose not to face it. Even more, they do whatever they can to avoid their fears. They organize their lives around avoiding potential fearful situations and make themselves believe they are doing the best for their lives. It may be true in some cases, but I bet they generally are missing the opportunity to live a more fulfilling life.

Other people appear not to have fear. They appear fearless, infallible, mighty and with the capacity to face anything. I am sure some are fearless, but most of them just hide behind that mask to prevent some insecurities from coming to the surface. Some of them will crumble when the circumstances align against them.

The rest of us live somewhere between those two extremes. Depending on what our fears are some people will see us as fearless, other will think us weak or cowards. But what matters is how we see ourselves. The only fears that can defeat us are those we are unable to face. Those we feed by deciding (consciously or unconsciously) are too big for us. Those we feed by avoiding.

For a long time I feared starting my own business. Being independent. I cherished the comfort of knowing where the next paycheck will come from, the innumerable excuses explaining why this isn't the right moment, the convenience of believing that latter things will be more suitable. The truth is things will only suit when I decide they will. The truth is fear can only be conquered when you look into its eyes. In my case, I don't know if this adventure will be successful or not, but I know I am already a winner. I have conquered one of my fears. And what about you? What is it you fear?

De todo por Wills: ¿Santos o Mockus?

Los invito a leer una discusión muy interesante entre una persona que prefiere a Mockus y otra que prefiere a Juan Manuel Santos como presidente.

De todo por Wills: ¿Santos o Mockus?

Looking ahead

This has been a busy week. The logistics around an international move are complex, tiring and bureaucratic. It is easy to see why this process is seen as insurmountable by many people, and will prevent them from moving to a different place. However, there is also a big sense of achievement once tasks are finished. We have sold the furniture, the boxes going to Colombia have been picked up and the trip home is almost completely booked… but that is not my main motivation. My main motivation is the beginning of a new phase, full of opportunities and hidden treasures, a new and exciting chapter. And this is what I would like to reflect on.

In Colombia we tend to look only at what is happening today. No, not really, in Colombia we tend to look at the present and somewhat the future but with a pessimistic approach. We tend to reminiscence about old times and to imagine worst case scenarios for the future. There is always something bad, always something wrong, there are corrupt people everywhere; there is lack of safety, there is always something going on. In brief, there are always reasons to be pessimistic about the future, a reason to explain why things are wrong. A reason to avoid responsibility and blame someone else. And with all these reasons and pessimism, we Colombians see a dark future.

But I believe we, in Colombia, need to see a different future. In Colombia we need to start recognizing and promoting the good aspects of our lives. We need to start celebrating the honest, transparent people, we need to start visiting and promoting all those parts of our country we know are a treasure and are worth seeing and enjoying. In Colombia we can do things well if we want, we can have a promising future if we want, in Colombia we can change if we want. But that is only possible if we start with ourselves. It will be possible if we follow rules and indications, if we see the good in other people, if we start doing random acts of kindness with no expectation of reward, and, above all, if we look ahead with optimism and hope. Because for every Colombian that starts believing there is a future, ten will question if that person could be right; it means ten people that will wonder whether they can believe as well. And once we change enough mindsets we will change our future.

That is why we must remember something JFK said: The question is not what the country can do for you, it is: What can you do for your country?. And what about start by believing it could be better?

What is a Colombian?

A few days ago the Colombian Constitutional Court issued a sentence which is by far more a reason for joy than anguish*. It does not matter if we believe the current presidency to be the best or worst in our country’s history, neither does it matter if we believe a group of judges have or don’t have the right to invalidate what appears to be the “people’s voice”, nor does it matter if the sentence jeopardizes the policies put in place by our current government. What matters is that there are people reminding us our long term future can not be held hostage by not following the rules of the game. What matters is the strength of the foundations on which our society has been built, foundations which will set us free. What matters is our constitution, a framework that was built twenty years ago, and for which many of us fought and for which many of us died. What matters are the foundations that will let us build our country, because Colombia is not what our parents made of it, it is what we can make of it for our children.

It is not without reason that Colombians have come up consistently on top of the list of the happiest people on earth. It is ironic. It is an irony since are problems are deep and well known: lack of opportunities, an appalling gap between rich and poor, social inequality, lack of safety, underdeveloped infrastructure, etc. But it is not without reason because there is a strong common ground amongst our people that we can use to build a better future. We are headstrong and believe in our future, we always “smile in the face of the storm’, we try and try and try, we have fun even when there are no excuses for it, we honestly believe that out there, somewhere, there is something better for each of us. However, is disconcerting how at the same time we despair and believe we have to ignore the rules or our opportunity won’t come, how we always think our neighbor is just waiting for an opportunity to take advantage of us; how we believe we can offer a hand but must take full advantage of any offered one.

But how is this related to the sentence of the courts? Everything and Nothing. Nothing, because in Colombia we believe the government and its institutions are a different world, that they do not reflect our way of being; but also Everything because that is not true. The government is made up of people like any of us, people that will behave the same way we do every day. And that government is just another face of our reality, another image of our society. An image that tends to show the negatives rather than the positives, a face sometimes full of shame. But, at last, a government institution has told us the rules need to be followed if we want a future, that we cannot short-sell our long term future for short term gain, especially silly short term gain; that our future belong to all of us not only some cheaters of the system, that if we really want to do something important we must do it properly. The court reminded us we are forgetting what it means to be Colombian: being Colombian is not being a cheater of the system, being Colombian is making our way forward regardless of the obstacles, being Colombian is to cherish the values of our ancestors: the sanctity of our families, the fundamental importance of our work and our duty to be decent and responsible. Because believing ourselves happy is a characteristic of the majority, a majority that knows those values are there in spite of appearances. Now, our job is to rescue those values.

*As I believe most people won’t know, the Colombian Constitutional Court has declared unconstitutional the ability of an individual to become president for the third time. And, as surprising as it may be, it was because it made the People and bureaucrats follow the established rules.

Uncertainty

When we decided to go back to Colombia, we knew it was not going to be easy. We know all the downsides: safety issues, lack of opportunities, poverty, corruption, etc. We grew up there and have lived thru most of them. But there is a current aspect of the environment in Colombia (Latin America actually!) that can impact our decision directly and is completely outside our control: the political environment. Colombia is a poor country located in what would be the poorest corner of the globe if Africa didn’t have the dubious title. There is poverty, inequality, lack of education and many more problems that are alien to the developed world. It is also a country where traditional leaders have ruled for the benefit of a few, and to the detriment of many. It is a country where a few live good lives and many just survive.

This context is the perfect breeding ground for radical movements that advocate the needs of the poor and the need for a government that reflects such set of priorities. But it has also spawned radical groups that –sponsored by some of those in power- try to maintain the status quo. The only common ground between these two groups is their radicalism. They will burn the country to the ground rather than to try and find a compromise with one another. It is their all or nothing approach that has murdered thousands of people in our country and that has prevented real progress to reach those who need it. And those who really need the change are the ones caught in the middle with no choice and no future. The pervasive reach of these groups is such, that the country is more polarized than ever. The voices that claim the grandeur of a leader of any extreme sound louder than the voices of reason; passion has taken the place of reasoning and any dissent is seen as a threat, not a difference. The path we are walking looks very much like the path of self-destruction.

The path that we seem to be walking is the only thing that makes me doubt the decision. Is it wise to try and create an enterprise in an environment where a corrupt minority calls the shots on the direction of the policies and the economy? Is it wise to try and create an enterprise where some people advocate a socialist model that punishes individual efforts and rewards inefficiencies backed by the government? Is it wise to go into the uncertainty of a country with no sensible leadership and a region pushing for a self-destructive transformation? The most sensible answer to these questions is no, but only by working the ship we can change its course. Only by playing the game we can change the outcome; only by our commitment and vision we can make these questions irrelevant. This is about seeding the seeds of social responsibility by the entrepreneurs; this is about making the economy stronger so more people can be in it rather than out of it; this is about working like the ripples in a pond: from inside towards everyone else generating a visible effect.

We will go to Colombia in a sea of uncertainty to be part of a change to make a difference. We will go to Colombia to make a difference in people’s lives. We will go to Colombia to live a different live. We will go to Colombia because that is the life we choose to live.