Monday, June 21, 2010

The falacy of fear

We all have different fears. From insignificant ones that are no more than a passing distraction to phobias that have the potential to wreak people’s lives. Feeling fear is a human characteristic, but our decision on how to face it is what differentiates people from one another.
 
Some people choose not to face it. Even more, they do whatever they can to avoid their fears. They organize their lives around avoiding potential fearful situations and make themselves believe they are doing the best for their lives. It may be true in some cases, but I bet they generally are missing the opportunity to live a more fulfilling life.

Other people appear not to have fear. They appear fearless, infallible, mighty and with the capacity to face anything. I am sure some are fearless, but most of them just hide behind that mask to prevent some insecurities from coming to the surface. Some of them will crumble when the circumstances align against them.

The rest of us live somewhere between those two extremes. Depending on what our fears are some people will see us as fearless, other will think us weak or cowards. But what matters is how we see ourselves. The only fears that can defeat us are those we are unable to face. Those we feed by deciding (consciously or unconsciously) are too big for us. Those we feed by avoiding.

For a long time I feared starting my own business. Being independent. I cherished the comfort of knowing where the next paycheck will come from, the innumerable excuses explaining why this isn't the right moment, the convenience of believing that latter things will be more suitable. The truth is things will only suit when I decide they will. The truth is fear can only be conquered when you look into its eyes. In my case, I don't know if this adventure will be successful or not, but I know I am already a winner. I have conquered one of my fears. And what about you? What is it you fear?

1 comment:

  1. That's a really interesting and I can see parallels in what I have done in the last 6 months! Fear holds us all back - but once you are in the deep end, you have to swim and you suddenly realise you are not sinking!

    ReplyDelete